The Day Before Christmas at UKC | |
By Mark Threlfall
(With apologies to Major Henry Livingston, Jr.)
T’was the Wednesday before Christmas,
The office was busy,
People scurrying about,
Making everyone dizzy.
The front desk was alive,
With customers and calls,
Melissa was trying,
To stay ahead of it all.
Magazines looked as festive,
As we’d ever seen,
Kelly’s hair was now red,
And Jessica’s was green.
Elyse and Johanna,
Were designing new pages,
Christina’s putting Bloodlines,
Together in stages.
Vicki and J Short,
Were working together,
Proofing the articles,
And making them better.
Tanya was dressed,
For a special occasion,
She was calling new vendors,
Her voice all sweet persuasion.
Dawn was working,
On a new next day air,
Angie was angry,
And pulling out her hair.
Connie and Emily,
Were transferring away,
A mountain of work,
To get done in a day.
Amanda was checking,
Kara’s in training, she’s new,
Andrea’s working with her,
So she’ll know what to do.
Keri’s doing research,
Carol’s processing litters,
Pat’s putting on hunt reports,
For those Coonhound critters.
Holly’s working on singles,
Andy’s on a call,
Russell’s answering questions,
He’s right on the ball.
Jo Anne’s at the hold files,
Brenda’s over there, too,
Steve’s writing a press release,
For an event that’s brand new.
Tony is Googling,
Looking for a solution,
Mike’s surrounded by monitors,
Risking electrocution.
Judy is typing,
With Strut by her feet,
Sara is teasing,
Carly with a treat.
Terri is upset,
With more bills to pay,
Paulette is sorry,
She came in today.
Denise was thinking,
Of upcoming events,
Michelle was renting,
Some new Premier tents.
Drew was making,
Some brand-new suggestions,
To Beth who was reading,
From her list of questions.
Shipping and Receiving,
It happens all day,
Jeremy’s happy,
With his music to play.
Jodi’s so quiet,
Helping out everyone,
She’s looking forward,
To some Holiday fun.
Jamie was scanning,
Finding DNA exclusions,
Talking to customers,
Clearing up their confusions.
Lisa’s now happy,
In Field Operations,
Loretta is working,
On HRC obligations.
Todd is ensconced,
In his office brand-new,
Two windows with a view,
Of Kalamazoo.
Allen and Arlene,
Are having a fight,
He says she’s wrong,
And she thinks she’s right.
Wayne’s in a meeting,
Oh, they never end,
Thinking of ways,
To make more than we spend.
And I am finishing,
Up this silly poem,
And looking forward,
To a long weekend at home.
Four days of rest,
In this season of good cheer,
Merry Christmas to all,
And have a Happy New Year!
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