Posted on 01/24/2008
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Things I Want to Accomplish in 2008…
by Mark Threlfall

I’m not one for New Year’s Resolutions. I think they are pretty self-defeating. People make them on New Year’s Day, when they are recovering from an evening of revelry and for the most part they’re broken by that afternoon. So rather than call these “resolutions” I’ll just state that I’d like to accomplish these things in the coming year.

1. Have more patience.

I don’t have a lot of patience. I’m going to try to have more in the coming year. I know this means a year of effort, forcing myself to pay attention to even the most harebrained ideas when I’d normally go into sleep mode or just get up and leave the room. I know I can do it. I just don’t want to spend the entire year making the effort. Maybe the year will zoom by. Maybe I can cram a year’s worth of patience into a couple of months. If I work on it, I can be done with this by oh, say…March.

We used to have three dogs. Now, all of a sudden, we have six. Please don’t misunderstand, I love dogs. I like one, maybe two. At the outside, I can love three. Six is off the charts. It’s not even in the realm of possibility. So in 2008, I am going to convince Judy to cut down on the number of dogs in some sneaky, underhanded manner.
Memo to self: Don’t let Judy see this article.

I know I need to do this. Like a lot of people, I have a lot of projects going on, a number of responsibilities and many commitments. I need to prioritize things so that I can accomplish more. I need to work smarter, not just harder. I took a seminar on this very subject last year. It was called “Managing Multiple Priorities and Deadlines.” It was a good seminar, but the really great part was the workbook. It had all kinds of little tricks, formulas and plans for getting more organized. I know I have it around here somewhere…

When I was single, working out became part of my daily regimen. Every day at lunchtime I used to go to the gym with another guy who works here. When one of us wasn’t up for it, one used to convince the other to go, usually by embarrassment. We’d announce in a loud voice, so the whole office could hear us, something like, “Oh, come on. You won’t be the only one there with pink shorts, I’m sure of it.”
Now that I’m married, I go everywhere with my wife. She’s not a gym rat, so we bought a treadmill and one of those exercise machines. They sure do make good clothes hangers.
But this year, I’m going to get in better shape. I’m going to start by eating healthier. I do a lot of the cooking, so I know I can do it. Portion control is the answer. I’m going to slowly increase my wife’s portions so she gains weight and that way I’ll look like I’m doing great.
Memo to self: Don’t let Judy see this article.

We look forward to spring as a time of rebirth, of planting and tending to the yard as a yearly ritual. We enjoy going to the local garden center and purchasing annuals, perennials, seed, mulch and fertilizer. We also replace any worn-out gardening tools, hoses, sprayers and the like.
Boy, on those first few warm days we dig, hoe, rake, plant and water like we’re possessed. We get the yard looking just beautiful and sit back to watch the explosion of colors as the plants and shrubs bloom.
Then it snows. Michigan plays her trump card once again. The mercury dips to freezing and all our hard work is covered in a blanket of white. All that can be seen is some tender seedlings bravely poking their heads out of the snow in search of a stray ray of sunshine. Then along come the deer to mow them off to ground level. Whatever stray sprigs of green that remain get gobbled up.
This year I’m going to pave the entire property and spray paint it green.

I know, I know. It’s the middle of March or something and you’re reading an article about “New Year Resolutions.” That’s why I didn’t call these New Year’s Resolutions. I called the “Things I Want to Accomplish in 2008.” So it’s already too late for a couple of these things to happen. Oh well, there’s always next year…